Now, can you handle the truth? I mean are you actually telling yourself the truth in areas of your life that are important, in your five to thrive, or are you actually trying just to be positive and tell yourself everything’s OK, when really it’s not, really you’re not on the path to getting where you want to go? Now see, there’s a difference between positivity and lying to yourself or being deceitful to yourself to protect yourself.
Now, I’m all for being positive and I think being positive is a key to living a great life, but you want to be positive and also honest and raw with yourself. For example, in your five to thrive, in your mind, are you not as smart as you really are telling yourself? Are people around you going, “Oh, that’s OK, don’t worry about your grades, or your performance, or your knowledge in a particular subject, you’re so good,” when you know you’re really not, and you’re living that lie?
You see, when you can be honest and clear with yourself, you can make a change. For example, if somebody was coming to me and telling me how great I am at auto mechanics, “Oh, Doug, you’re really good. Don’t even worry about it, you know, most people don’t know about auto mechanics, so, you know, don’t even fret it,” and the truth is I don’t know much about it. It’s something I’m actually interested in learning and I know I don’t know much about it.
But if I’m honest with myself in that area, and I’m just using this as a random example of course, but if I’m honest with myself, I can then pivot and change, and I can say, “Look, I’m not smart in this particular area of my life that I want to grow in, so what could I do, what’s the next best thing that I can do in this situation?” Then in that particular situation, I can pivot, change, and start studying. I can look for a course, I can find something else to do, I can study under another mechanic.
Now, this is in all areas. This could be your speaking. This could be your overall intelligence. If you’re really not a smart person, and some of us aren’t, and people are lying to you to make you feel good, that doesn’t help you, because if you’re not smart, what you can do is learn, you can read, you can learn more about a subject matter. What about your body, right? How often do we look in the mirror and tell ourselves these micro lies? I certainly have done it.
I come from a fitness background and I’ll make an excuse about having a newborn child, or traveling, or being sick, or running multiple companies, and that is why I’ve gained so much weight, when the truth is, the truth is I gained weight and now in that reality I can pivot, and I can take a step right away to make a change, and a change that I want to make, not a change that somebody else wants to make, and I’m not being critical about myself either. I’m just being honest with myself.
What about your soul? Where are you with your relationship with your god, or whatever it is, with your religion, or your spirituality, or meditation, or whatever you are with that, be honest and raw with yourself and what can you do. Now, also, relationships. This is one we often lie to ourselves about, right? “My marriage is great,” or we tell everybody else that. “How are you doing?”
“I’m doing fantastic.” Really there are all kinds of things going on in the background, right? We’re lying to ourselves and to each other. So, in your relationships, where are you honestly? Do you have a lot of guy friends, do you have a lot of girlfriends, do you have people you can confide in? Do you have people you can pick up the phone when things aren’t going well and at a moment’s notice, call them, and get the love that you need, or the help that you need, or whatever it is that you’re craving in that relationship? Do you have business connections, or how do people actually really see you? This is important, but also your relationship with yourself. Do you truly love yourself, and be honest about it, because many of us don’t.
What about your business? How’s your business really doing? I coach entrepreneurs and business owners all the time, so I’m in their mix every single day, and I can tell you that a lot of these extremely successful business owners aren’t as successful as you may think. That brand new Mercedes-Benz is on a lease, that new house they just bought they’re almost going to get foreclosed on. I get to see the day-to-day operations of behind the curtain because people allow me into their lives so I can help them better themselves. When doing this, I can tell you that in your business, often times for some reason we’re taught to lie about business, we’re taught to lie to ourselves too. “Things are going great, we’re on an upward trend,” when really you know things aren’t going as well. You’re not pushing the envelope, you’re not growing your business to a level that allows you to support yourself, your family, and your employees.
What I want you to do right now is grab your journal. Grab your journal, and of course I want you to write out your five to thrive, your mind, your body, your soul, your relationships, and your business, and in each category I want you to write to yourself where are you lying to yourself? Now, maybe you’re not lying to yourself in all of the categories, and maybe it’s one, or maybe none, that’s up to you, you decide. But for a lot of us, we lie to ourselves in multiple facets, right, and once you determine what that lie is or that story you’re telling yourself, now you can come clean in with the truth.
Now, I want you to have that, so I’m going to use body as an example, so I’ll use me. I put on weight, right, 190, 190 pounds is my fighting weight, I’m at 230 right now, right, so I’ve made this huge lie, now I’m being honest with myself. Immediately what I want you to do is to determine where you want to get based on that lie, and take an action step, right? For me that action step is right away I ordered meal prep, hired a trainer even though I have a fitness background, and I put on my running shoes even though I have a cold, and went out for a walk, right, immediate action to change that course, and that’s what I want you to do with your five to thrive. How about your business, your relationships, your soul, your mind, etc?
Now, once you have that, take immediate action now, and bonus points for those of you that go to The Author of Your Own Story Group and post this so you can get accountability, so we can keep you accountable so you can actually continue on the path to The Author of Your Own Story lifestyle. That’s it for me today. As always, go to www.AuthorofYourOwnStory.com where you can get more tips, tricks, and insights right to your inbox and we can continue this conversation. Have a great day and remember to go out and be the Author of Your Own Story.
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