Now, what I’m talking about today, Come Up With a Better Story, I get so excited and passionate about this, and we’ve talked to you about it before in other daily growth hacks, but I just had a conversation this morning with a family member. Now, of course, family people, members of ours, they can really push our buttons, right? They know exactly what to say to kind of drive our nerves or trigger us from past experiences that we may have had with them.
Now, luckily, in my stage of development, I can really let all of that to just bounce off me. I don’t take it personally. What does affect me is when a family member isn’t living up to their own potential. That actually really hurts me, not from a judgmental standpoint, but from a standpoint where I’m hearing them complain all the time, and I’m like, “Ah, I just want you to be happy. I just want you to love. I just want you to enjoy life.”
A lot of that is really just their story. They live in a story over and over and over again, and I know you know people just like this, and maybe you’re one of them, maybe you’re not, I know I found myself being one of them many, many times, when you peel back that layer of those onions. You know these people. They’re always complaining perhaps, or maybe it’s someone who’s always sad, or maybe it’s someone who’s always broke, or maybe it’s someone who’s always a victim. It’s somebody else’s fault that things are happening to them in their lives. They’re a victim of circumstance, right?
We all know people like this, so what I’m going to ask you to do is make sure you don’t become one of them, and what I want you to do is write a better story. I want you to write a better about yourself and, when you write your life story, make sure you’re the hero. Are you the hero in this journey? I want you to write a story about you that you can live into. I want it to be epic. I want it to be a bestseller, a page-turner that you just don’t want to put down and you’re like, “Wow, you know, this person,” which is you, “is just living an epic life, a life that I’ve only dreamed of.”
That’s what I did, and that where came up with the Author of Your Own Story concept is when I realized at a young age that I could write into my future and be whatever I want it to be. I was a business owner at a very young age, and people told me I couldn’t do it. They were, “Don’t do that. Go back to school. Get your MBA.” They gave me a lot of advice, and it was great advice for them, but not for me.
When I wrote out what I really wanted, what would really make my life amazing by the time I was 30, at the time, I’m in my early 20’s and 30 years old, right, and so, by that time, what would it be? One of them was owning my own business in the fitness industry. I really wanted to do it. I was passionate about helping people. I was passionate about health and wellness and fitness, so I just wanted to do it. I love having my own business, so I started several of them probably because I’m just crazy, but I did that, and I wrote that into a story.
When I first wrote it, I was kind of like, “Oh, yeah, you know, I can go work for somebody. I can be independent,” all these things that I knew I could do and do easily, but it wasn’t exciting. It wasn’t an exciting story. I was like, “Wait, would I really want to read this and pick it up off a bookshelf and, and actually enjoy it?” The answer is no. It just didn’t turn me on, so to speak. I just wasn’t excited. I wasn’t a hero. I was just the guy going through the motions.
Along this way of my journey, now, I’m 40, I’ve written and rewritten my story many, many times, and I try to do it every year at least, and at least revisit that story just to make changes because I change. As I mature, my wants, my desires change, and now I’m a family man, I’ve got a beautiful boy and a lovely wife, and so it’s changed, right, so, but I still want the adventure, and I still want to be the hero, and I still want to be the page turner.
I want to be the guy that, when I’m reading the book and, frankly, no offense, I don’t care what you think about that story, but, for me, that when I’m reading that book, I’m like, “Man, this guy’s a hero. This is the guy that I want to be.” That’s what I want to read, so that’s what I want to write down, and I want you to do the same.
I use the Five to Thrive to make sure I’m covering all those five areas, and that’s where we came up with the Five to Thrive. It’s a holistic representation of you and your life. Does it cover everything? Maybe not, but we try to fit everything into those five categories. If you have other ones, let us know, and maybe we’ll see how we can meld them in. We’re always adjusting as well, but this is where I came up with the Author of Your Own Story concept is I wanted other people to live into it.
I was tired of people telling me how epic my life was and it was good for me and, “Yeah, Doug, I wish I could do that, but I can’t do it because I have a job. I can’t do it because I have kids. I can’t do it because I have a family. I can’t do it because I don’t have enough money. I can’t do it.” Whatever. I heard so many excuses, and it just drove me nuts, and so I wanted to help people, and that’s where we came up with the Author of Your Own Story, and that’s why I do these daily growth hacks, just to hopefully give you something to think about, a short, little nugget in the morning that can hopefully trigger something. It could be something like, “Doug’s crazy,” and that’s fine, too. It maybe just makes you feel better about your life, but, hopefully, you’re doing the work and you’re doing these exercises and you’re writing a story.
I want that story to be amazing and compelling to you. If you’re listening to this right now and you’re kind of going, “Oh, man, my story is not that compelling,” this is your wake up call. This is your chance to write that down. I don’t care if you’re a millionaire. In fact, everyone of my personal clients are millionaires. It doesn’t mean they’re happy. I know this. I know it really, really, really well.
Now, I don’t care what it is, what stage in life, what your past is. Just write a new story. What I want you to do is carve out a couple of hours. If you’re like most people, you’re like, “I just don’t have a couple of hours. I’m, I’m busy. I just got all these things going,” and, to that, I say, “Bull crap. You can develop a couple of hours in your life. I know it. If you’re watching any TV at all, if you’re doing any reading, you’re doing any leisurely activities, you have time.
This is your story. This is your life, and, to me, this is one of the most important things to do. This is an epic representation of what you’re going to become.
I had a conversation with somebody just last night, and I said, “Oh, yeah, you’re, you’re busy doing your day to day, but you’re too busy to plan your life,” and I said it very snarkily and very sarcastically. I’m not really sure they picked up on it, but what I was really trying to them was like, “Look, I get it. You’re busy with your day to day life running through, but you’re busy being busy rather than being strategic and planning the life that you want to live.”
You’re not going to end up having this epic life most likely unless you plan it out and do some work and even subconsciously get pulled to those desires. That’s what I want for you. I want you to write an epic bestseller right now. It just has to be a paragraph. Right? Maybe a page or two, if you’re inspired to do so, but even just a paragraph on who is that person. Who is the hero inside of you, and what are they doing to live an epic life?
That’s it for me today. In our groups, in our Author of Your Own Story University, we do a deep, deep dive in this. It’s extremely, extremely important that you do as well. In these videos, I try to keep them all under 10 minutes and as close to 5 as I can, and I can see they’re already going up. If you’re listening to this in the podcast, you totally understand what I’m talking about.
What I want you to do is go over and make sure you’re on our email list. You got to get on that newsletter because there are so many other bonuses that are going to help you out and things that I just can’t talk about in these daily growth hacks.
I want to make sure you also get inspired by the interviews. We have amazing people coming up that I get the chance to do a long formal interview, over two hours where I dive deep because I don’t want to just ask them the soundbite questions that you hear everywhere. I want to get to know them and really know what happened for them and what moves them passionately to allow them to become the authors of their own stories so they can move you, because I’m just one man and my story is unique to me. There are so many other people doing epic things, and I want to make sure you get a chance to hear from them, too.
What I want you to do, of course, and I ask this a lot because, actually, it’s so important, is grow your tribe. Share this with three people, three people right now. If you’re working out, just hit “Stop” and hit the “Share” button on your iPhone, on your android and share it with three people. If you’re watching this on YouTube or Facebook or wherever you are, or LinkedIn, just share it with three people. In that way, you could have some conversations and conversations that matter. This is all important for you to grow your tribe. I want you to grow and I want you to have accountability partners to allow you to go in there.
That’s it for me today. As always, have a great day, and go out and be the author of your own story.