I was having a conversation with a friend recently, and we were talking about dreams and priorities, and he was telling me about all the great ideas that he had, and all the things that he was going to do. I thought it was really a great conversation. Then, what I realized was something that I talk to a lot of my clients about. With coaching clients, one of the first things I ask them is to send me a screenshot of their calendar. Now, they often think this is weird, like, “Why would I send you my calendar?” Well, the reason I ask them this is if you show me your calendar you’re gonna show me your priorities. Sure, many of us say, “Yes,
Well, the reason I ask them this is if you show me your calendar you’re gonna show me your priorities. Sure, many of us say, “Yes, family is first.” Or, “Yes, my business is so important.” Or, “My health. I know my health is really important.” But when I look at your calendar, have you scheduled time for your family? Have you scheduled time for your workouts and your health? Or am I going to see meetings in there or other events that have nothing to do with what you claim your priorities are?
Now I’m not saying this to talk down to you, but I’m saying this as a reality check. When we look at our calendars in our day to day lives, we can actually see what our priorities are. See, our focus is whatever we’re putting our time in. If your focus is on your family, your family should be counted. You should have date nights with your wife or your husband, you should have family time, you should have connection time with your kids. Maybe if you don’t have a family, maybe it’s a loved one or friends. Or maybe you’re telling me, “Doug, my health is so important, it’s amazing to me.” Awesome, I fully support you. But in your calendar, are you scheduling your workouts? Are you scheduling meals where you can sit down and eat? Are you scheduling things, activities, to better yourself?
You see, when I look at your calendar I can tell you exactly what your priorities are. I would say nine times out of 10 I get a client’s calendar, and they come in and they hire me as a coach, and what they’re telling me is, obviously their life isn’t perfect, but they have all these priorities. You know, “I’ve lost the relationship with my wife” is a common one I hear. And then I say, “Show me your calendar.” And I can look at it and I can see appointments from 6:00 a.m. to 8:00 p.m., all reflecting business. No workouts, no date night, no connection time. No wonder your relationships aren’t working well, you have no time in there. You’re not investing into the emotional piggy bank that is the investment of your relationship with your spouse.
Now, I can also talk to somebody who hired me and said, “Doug, my business isn’t going well.” And I can look at their calendar, and I’ll see golf, I’ll see other events. And there’s nothing wrong with these, but if you don’t have balance in your life, and you don’t … which we talked about in another video called Balance, if you don’t have this and you look at your wheel of life, what areas are missing? You need to schedule those in your calendar.
So, today what I’m gonna offer you is this – pull up your calendar now, and pull up your journal. If you were to look at your calendar like you were your own coaching client, you were your own life coach, what would you see? Would you see workouts scheduled? Now don’t write down what you want to see, write down what you’re seeing now before you make these changes. Now, are you seeing connection time with your family? If you’re not scheduling this, chances are somebody else is going to fill that spot for you. They’re gonna fill that into your schedule.
I know for me, I have nine people that have access to my calendar. That’s a lot of people, they’re going to fill that up as much as possible. And that’s why I make sure each Sunday I reflect on my previous week and schedule the weeks forward. I also have reoccurring appointments that are always in my schedule. These are things that I can move if I need to, but I always have them in there to remind me, “Hey, from six to eight it’s all about my health and wellness, nothing else. Nothing gets in that way.” After six, I have connection time with my family after 6 p.m. I have things set in my calendar that reflect my priorities, and this has allowed me to become the author of my own story. This has allowed me to do the things that I’ve done, to travel the world, to run multiple businesses, and to keep growing and expanding.
Once you take control of your calendar, then you can start working on your ideal day. So again, what I’m asking you to do is pull up your calendar, pull out your journal, go ahead and be your own life coach. Write down what you’re seeing.
Share in the groups or the comments below. I’d love to hear your feedback, and I’d love to assist you in becoming the author of your own story.
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