Oftentimes in the past, I used to find myself comparing myself to others. In the area of fitness and health, I would look around and I thought of myself as an athlete. You can joke about it all you want. I played sports pretty competitively. And even on the field, the soccer field … soccer was my game … I would compare myself. Am I as good enough? Am I as fast as this other guy? Am I as strong? Am I as tough on the ball? I would always be comparing myself.
And at the end of the end, there was always someone who was faster than me, or somebody else on the field who was just stronger than me, or somebody else on the field who could kick the ball further than I could. I was always in a losing battle because I was picking little micro-segments to compare myself with different people.
In the area of business, I did this, as well. There was a business owner who had more clients than I did or a business owner who was making more money than I was or a business owner who was taking more vacations. Or perhaps it was in relationships when I was dating. Maybe it was somebody else who had a better-looking girlfriend or his girlfriend was nicer and treated him better than I did.
Whatever it was. I was comparing myself in all these micro-segments in my life, and just really getting depressed. Because when you compare yourself to other people, you really don’t know their story. This is why it’s Author of Your Own Story because your story is going to be different than mine. If you compare yourself to me, you don’t know what goes on behind the scenes, and maybe it’s not what you want. Maybe you don’t my life of the digital nomad where I’m traveling anywhere I want to. Maybe I have a family and you just don’t want one. Whatever it is.
When we live in the world of comparison, it only sets us up for depression and failure. There’s always going to be someone or something that’s perceived to be better. Now if you’re going to compare, compare yourself to your previous self. This is a great way of doing it. I would say, when I’m talking to a potential client who wants to work with me personally on a coaching basis or with one of my coaches, the thing that I most often hear is, “I’m in the same place today that I was a year or two years ago” or “I feel stuck.” Really what they’re saying is I haven’t grown. I haven’t grown at the level that I know I’m capable of. And that’s why I’m willing to invest time, money and energy into a high-level coach, someone who’s going to push me and pull me into that direction.
But asking you right here, right now, compare yourself only to your former self. By comparing yourself to others, you just set yourself up for failure, and again, you don’t know that person’s path. You don’t know that person’s journey, and you don’t know what’s going on behind the scenes.
You see, when I was comparing myself on the soccer field, for example, I was comparing myself to someone who was faster than me … which was easy to do, by the way, because most people were faster than me … but when I was comparing myself, that person who was faster than me wasn’t as strong as I was. I was stronger than they were and I was able to push them off the ball. But then when I compared myself to the person who was stronger than me, I was actually faster than them.
When you look at this as a comparison level, you just don’t know. Or maybe they were just all around a better athlete, but they didn’t know how to run a business. Or maybe they had a bad relationship. Or maybe they just were better than me. It didn’t matter. When I compared myself to myself and tried to be 1% better, that gave me a level that I could always keep rising, because I know my journey and I knew where I was. And I invite you to do the same.
I’m going to ask you to grab your journal. Write out your five to thrive and where you are in there and have you been improving incrementally over the past six months? If the answer is yes, I applaud you and keep it up. Don’t compare yourself to others. Just look back at your own progress. Hopefully, you’re doing the 90 Day Game. If you don’t know what the 90 Day Game is, go ahead and shoot us a message at Author of Your Own Story, and we’ll let you know. There’s also something in the Seven Day Jump Start to being the author of your own story, that covers the 90 Day Game. It’s a free course that we put out there just to get you as a jump start or a catalyst on your journey.
Then in your journal, what I want you to do is look at where you’re going. And so if you haven’t improved, reach out. We can help you. We have several things that we’ve done, besides these daily growth hacks. We have courses on authorofyourownstory.com that allow you to further your education.
The Author of Your Own Story University is extremely affordable and an entire growth process that you can drive into. I can’t emphasize this enough. I think everybody should be on this program. But of course, what I want you to do is share this with three people, so you have conversations like this and have people to keep you accountable for your growth. Now don’t compare yourself with those three people, because you’re only comparing yourself to your former self. You’re only comparing yourself to your former self. I’ll say it again. Make sure you’re doing that.
And then, of course, go over to authorofyourownstory.com and get on that newsletter. It’s just a way for you to get there. You can unsubscribe any time. We all know how to do that, but this way you’re guaranteed to get the latest tips, tricks, and techniques delivered right to your inbox.
That’s it for me today. I will see you tomorrow. Have an amazing day. Go out and inspire someone simply by being the author of your own story.
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