This is a reader’s question or a listener’s question, I should say. One of the questions that came in was, “Doug, what’s the deal with daily affirmations? Are they a joke? Are they real? Should I be doing them, or should I just throw them out the window? There’s so much conflicting information out there.”
Well, I’m here to say that daily affirmations are excellent. It just really depends, like anything, on what you do with them. What I mean is, if your daily affirmation, let’s say, is, “I’m happy.” Maybe you’ve been a little down and you want to increase your happiness so you’re going to do your daily affirmation just telling yourself you’re happy. Now, of course, I think daily affirmations should align with your Five to Thrive, which is also aligned with your goals. Let’s go back to that example of just being happy. If you’re sitting there in a room, you’re saying your affirmations, you’re sitting down, you’re tired, you just woke up, and you’re, “I’m happy. I’m happy,” and you really have this physiology and emotion of just being depressed and sad. It’s not going to work. It’s not going to work for you.
As Tony Robins, and somebody who’s been a mentor of mine for many years calls it … He doesn’t prefer daily affirmations, he calls them incantations. Incantations, but in-can-tations. The reason he takes this phraseology and uses it differently is that he wants your whole body to be in it. I found that to be true, too. You see, even back when I was playing at high-level soccer teams, our coaches would have us visualize. Think about winning. They would have us get into it. I didn’t really get it at the time, but, of course, you’re with a bunch of other guys, and you get worked up, and you’re ready to go. You see this in sporting events, even professional sports, even today. The reason for this is the more you animate or bring your body, your physiology into what your thought process is, the more you’re going to actually feel it.
For example, when you think about, say example we use all the time, you think about a depressed person. What does a depressed person look like? Humped shoulders, slunched head, looking down, really down, kind of a frown on their face. You just kind of say, “That person’s depressed.” Well, if you put your physiology, your body in that position long enough, you become depressed. The same is true if you go the opposite way. So what does a confident, powerful person look like? Right? Chest is out. Shoulders are relaxed, down, and back. Head is up high. Standing is firm. Deep diaphragmic breaths. If you do that position, you become more confident naturally.
The same thing is with your affirmations. With your affirmations, yes, I think they’re critical because I think whatever your mind is thinking of is what you naturally start to move towards. Right? You just start to do that. Whatever you’re focusing on is really what it is. An affirmation is just a reminder of what you want and what you want to focus on. If you have an affirmation to be happy, then what you want to do is go, “Okay, I’m happy,” and really get into it. Think about some times in your life that you’ve just been so incredibly happy. I know for some people, maybe it’s been a year or two that you’ve really had just an unbelievable happy time. Life can throw you down at times.
Think back when you were a kid, or think of a time that you’ve seen a loved one, or you’ve seen a friend. All of us have them. Go there. Go into that moment. Remember what it smells like, what it sounds like, what it felt like. Was it cold? Was it warm? What was that moment? Then get into that affirmation. Don’t sit down. Don’t sit down. Stand up. Get into your affirmations. If it’s something happy … I want to think that I’m playing with my newborn son. He’s 17 weeks now, and oh my gosh he’s when he giggles. How could you not be happy? I get to that moment, just remember, just picture him giggling, and then I got to get excited and go, “You know what? I’m happy each and every day. I enjoy every moment of each and every day, which makes me happy.” That would be the kind of affirmation that I would write down and really get into.
Again, I think you should have affirmations for every category of your Five to Thrive. This is what I’m going to ask you to do: remember, you need to take action. Listening to these or watching these isn’t enough. Take action. We’ve done almost a hundred episodes of the Daily Growth Hacks. You need to take action. Pretty soon we’re going to be taking them down and putting the next season up. So take action now, in this moment. There’s no other time than the present. Grab your journal. Write down your Five to Thrive. Remember, that’s your mind, your body, your soul, your relationships, and your business. Write affirmations, or incantations, or statements, positive statements that lead you in the direction that you want to go.
For example, for your mind, I could say, “I speak Spanish with poise and confidence. I speak Spanish with poise and confidence.” I would say that over and over and really get into it. Imagine myself having a fluent conversation in Spanish, or as fluent as I can because that’s one of my goals by the end of this year, is to be able to have a conversation in Spanish.
Then maybe my body, “My body is full of energy. My body is full of energy. My body is full of energy,” and get into it, right. The opposite happens. I used to be the guy that says, “I’m always tired, I ran five businesses while the time was four,” when I used to say it. I’ve gotten even busier. As soon as I got rid of, “I am tired,” always saying that, my energy increased. It’s the weirdest thing, right? What you focus on is what you get. Now, you have to do the work, of course. There’s no secret to this. It’s really about focusing on something and going towards that goal. These affirmations or incantations are just reminders. Right?
Soul. You can say, “I am peaceful and tranquil whenever stress comes my way. I am peaceful and tranquil whenever stress comes my way.” Whatever you want to say. That’s one that I would use for the soul. I’m making these up on the fly, but I do this a lot. I have a set list of affirmations, or incantations, that I read on regular basis. I take it a step further because I’m just crazy and I get busy. I actually record it. I record it here on a microphone and I listen to it. I listen to it on my way to the gym.
I will listen to kind of a condensed version of what I call my Hour of Power, and in that has my incantations, or affirmations. When I’m on my game, and I’m human so I’m no always, but when I’m on my game, I get into it. I try to loosen my body up. Hopefully I’m running or moving while I’m doing it. Sometimes I’m in the car. I really to repeat them, and repeat them with emotion because I realize that if I’m going to do it, if I’m going to do anything, I might as well do it with my all, with my gusto. Really go out there. I mean, there’s no sense in just half-assing something. There just isn’t. It doesn’t make any sense. Might as well go sit on the couch, or watch a movie, and enjoy yourself some other way.
If you’re going to do something to better your life, to become the author of your own story, you’re going to have to put the work into it. There are just no two ways about it. I’m all for ease and flow, but ease and flow involve work too. It involves doing those little things. I’m here to tell you, as somebody that’s actually written their own story and has been able to live just an epic life, that I continue to live, and travel where I want to, when I want to, run my businesses the way I want to. Live my own story. I’m here to tell you, this is one small step there. All of these are steps. They’re all little critical elements to getting you to become the author of your own story.
So I encourage you unless you’re at the gym … If you’re at the gym, you can take little notes in between the sets, unless you’re doing some kind of circuit. Take little notes afterward. Set a timer. Set an alarm on your phone right now to remind yourself to do this exercise if you can’t do it right now. If you can do it right now, grab a piece of paper. If you’re at work, pull up a Word document. Use a Google document or Evernotes. You can keep these Daily Growth Hacks. Keep going, you know? Then list them. What I want you to do is list your Five to Thrive, list the affirmations, list why you want them, and then practice them. Go into the mirror and practice them. See yourself. Make sure you have the energy. Once you do that, what I want you to do, is do it one more time but take it to the next level. Take your energy, emotion, everything to just one other level.
Last but not least, I want you to share this with three other people. It’s really, really difficult. It’s possible, but it’s really difficult to become the author of your own story if you don’t have a tribe behind you if you don’t have a support team. Imagine going into battle and being an army of one, versus a huge army. Imagine just going and playing a sporting event. Right? Soccer is my sport. Imagine if I showed up to the field with no other guys on my team. It’d be a tough game. You’d just forfeit. The game’s over, right? I want to recruit people as much as possible. I’m recruiting you. I want you to be on my side. I want to live The Author of My Own Story lifestyle the rest of my life, so I’m recruiting you to hold me accountable and have conversations that mean something. Have conversations at a deeper level. Truly that’s what we all want. We all want that.
What I want you to do is recruit three people. If you don’t have three people, go over to The Author of Your Own Story group, join the conversation in there, introduce yourself, and instantly you’re going to have hundreds of people right there. If you don’t, share this with three people and build your tribe. You’ll be surprised at the conversations and the level and the depth of the relationships it takes when you do this. If you’ve been sharing this with three people, pick three additional people, and share it, and continue that conversation. That’s it for me today. Remember, go out and be the author of your own story.
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