I just got off an intake call with an old buddy of mine. This guy I’ve known gosh, almost 20 years now, and during that time, he’s actually been in the same place. Now, what he said to me was, “Doug, I’m actually exactly in the same place I am today, where I was when I last saw you,” and that was almost 20 years ago. And what he was talking about was not only in his financial life, but also in the area of his marriage, in the area of his relationships with his friends, in the area of his business. He hadn’t changed, he hadn’t grown up is really what happened.
And we actually started talking, and I said, “Look, I’m going to do a coaching session with you. We’ve been friends for a long time. Let me see if I can help you out.” And he agreed.
And as we went through the coaching session, I got very emotional because it became very clear, what he was doing was actually robbing his family, robbing his family of his gifts. So he hadn’t changed. He was relying on them to fill his cup rather than allowing his cup to be filled and overflowing into theirs. He hadn’t changed, he hadn’t evolved. He was still the same young boy that I had met almost 20 years ago.
Now, here he is, as a grown man. He’s got kids, a family, a business, yet he’s acting as if he’s still in his early 20s. What he hadn’t actually figured out was a way to move the needle. And he didn’t figure out why he was doing what he was doing.
When I actually said, “Hey,” we set goals and I said, “Well, why? Why did you want these goals?” He gave me his reasons. Then I asked him the next question, a question I ask everybody, “Who will this affect? Who will this affect if you actually achieve these goals that you set?” And each and every goal, he put his wife and his children. And that’s where it gets really emotional, right? It gets really emotional because it’s so easy for us often to let ourselves down. How often do we say we’re going to do something and just not. We don’t show up. We don’t show up fully in our own power, we don’t show up as the men or women that we could be, because it’s easy to let ourselves down.
But I asked him the question and I’ll ask you, and I know from my own experience, I won’t let anybody else down. In the past, more often I would let myself down all the time, but I’ve developed that relationship with myself where I have that integrity within me, to love myself and honor myself. But I would never let you down. I just wouldn’t. Don’t we all do that? Don’t we all go the extra mile for our friends, our family, our loved ones, strangers especially, holding doors open, but we don’t hold the doors open for ourselves? And that’s what he was doing.
And then what I told him, I said, “Look. Every day I want you to wake up and look at who you’re doing this for. Do you want to be the next five years in the same place, having the same conversation with me, and saying, ‘Doug, I just haven’t changed. I still need help?'”
I looked at his life through his Five to Thrive, and we go a little deeper on that in coaching calls, but just even the Five to Thrive, we look and that and I said, “On a scale of one to 10, being real, raw and honest with me, where are you?” And he was in fours and fives. Yeah, he had a couple sixes here and maybe even a seven, but we all deserve, you deserve, as well as I, to be living at eights, eights and above throughout our lives, all the time. Yeah, if something dips in a day, that happens, but you should be right back up there at an eight, nine or 10. And I want you to have all 10s. That’s what I really, truly want for all of you. And now, even if you’re at an eight, that’s great, but if you’re below an eight, we need to do something today to change that. You need to move the needle.
I’m here to help you, and I’m happy to do it, just like I do with my coaching clients. My coaching clients are firing at nines and above all the time. That is their thermostat, that is their set point and I want that for you, just like I want for my old friend.
Now he’s on his path, and this is the first step in that journey that we had together. And I hope, hope, hope, hope for not only his sake, but for the sake of his kids and for his wife, that he continues taking these steps, the steps necessary, so 90 days from now, when I talk to him … I’ll talk to him sooner than that, but 90 days he is not even the same man. I hope 90 days from now, if he does and follows the plan that we laid out today, just moments ago, he will be unrecognizable to his former self, because he’ll be living in his own story. And that is what the Author of Your Own Story lifestyle is all about.
That’s it from me today. Go over to AuthorOfYourOwnStory.com, where we’ll give you more tips, tricks and techniques, delivered right to your inbox each and every day, so you can continue on your path.
And make sure you share this with at least three people. The reason that he actually got on a phone call with me it’s because somebody shared it with him. And I invite you to do the same thing. The time for your change is now, and you may open this up by sharing this with three other people, you may open up somebody else’s life, and allow them the permission to step into their own story.
Inspire somebody by being the Author of Your Own Story, and I will see you tomorrow.
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