What do I mean? Stop lying to yourself. When I say that, what I’m talking about is all the lies that we tell ourselves on a daily basis. These are lies that come from previous stories. Stories about our past. These stories become records playing in our head over and over again on some kind of crazy loop. Now, what these stories do, is they disempower us. Now, these stories are things that we’ve made up based on past experiences, or things people have told us, or things that have happened.
Some of the common ones I hear from people are, “Well, I don’t have enough money to start my own company,” or, “I don’t have enough money to do X, Y, and Z,” or, “I’m not good looking enough for him or her,” or, “I’m too fat to do this, that, or the other,” or, “I’m not athletic enough,” or, “I don’t have time to do X, Y, and Z.” “Doug, I’m just not camera-ready yet and I’m going to work on that and then I’ll go ahead and do my own videos too.” I hear this all the time and I’ve got my own records playing in my own head. Now, this is obviously an analogy, but these are things that we’re constantly telling ourselves. These are disempowering stories. Now, if you want to be the author of your own story, write into your future, you can’t allow these disempowering stories to occur, but you can’t lie to yourself either.
You can’t pretend like they don’t exist. That’s the key. The key is recognizing that you have disempowering beliefs or disempowering stories, recognizing them, and then changing the script. Flip the script on these things. Now, what I want you to do, we’re going to get right into it. This is an exercise and it’s going to take some time. Guess what? You have enough time. You have as much time as you want to create. Take some time. Grab some sheets of paper. Grab your journal. If you have it, that’s where I want you to write in. Now, what I want you to do is write every disempowering story you’ve told yourself or tell yourself currently. For me, one that came up was six months ago my wife pointed out, was I was always saying, “I’m tired. I’m always tired.” That was a story I told myself and when I eliminated that phrase from my vocabulary, suddenly my energy increased.
Not only did I eliminate that, but I did exactly what I’m going to tell you to do. Now, I’ve done this exercise in the past and recently it was reinvigorated within side of me the story of this exercise from Lisa Nichols. If you haven’t found Lisa Nichols before, go out, she’s got some great resources for you. What I want you to do, is write out each disempowering story you have about yourself and leave a space. Leave three to five lines and then write out the next one. Yours might look like, something like, “I’m always tired. You know what? I just don’t have enough time to build another company yet,” or, “You know what? I’m just not camera-ready,” or, “The background is just not good enough. People aren’t going to watch it because they’re going to want to see lights, camera, action, the whole nine. It’s just not there.” Whatever your stories are. There are all kinds of stories that are out there and everybody’s is unique.
Of course, there are some common ones. Now, these stories tend to go through the five to thrive, right? We have stories about our mind, right? “I’m not smart enough,” or, “I don’t know X, Y, or Z,” or, “When I learn this, then I can,” right? Whatever that story is. With your body, “I’m not in shape enough. I’m too fat. I’m too skinny. I’m too young. I’m too old.” I’ve heard them all and the flip sides of both coins. I’ve seen fitness models say, “They’re too fat,” and I’ve seen fitness models say, “They’re too in shape and people aren’t going to listen to them.” I’ve heard everything in between. Now, mind, body. Now, your soul. What’s going on there? “I just don’t have time to meditate right now. Actually, I don’t feel passion. When I find my passion, that’s when everything’s going to work.” These are things … These are all lies. These are all lies and false, disempowering stories we tell ourselves.
Now, with our mind, body, soul, then we got relationships. What’s going on in your relationships? “Well, when I look good then I might meet the right him or her,” or, “I’m just not in the right relationship yet. As this relationship fades or gets better, then I can step forward.” All kinds of stories. Or, “I don’t know him or her. I don’t have the right connections in relationships.” Business. Business is a common one. “I don’t have enough money or time to start my new business,” or, “I don’t know enough people or the right people to start my new business,” or, maybe it’s I don’t want to start a business, maybe you’re just in a job you don’t like. Is it really the business, is the issue? Is that what’s holding you back, or is it something else? What are the lies you’re telling yourself surrounding your mind, your body, your soul, your relationships, and of course, your business?
Now, once you’ve written these out. Now, I want you to write them all out. Take time to make an extensive list. You’re going to leave three to five lines between them. You got your extensive list and if you’re just the average person, you should have probably five to seven pages here. Five to seven good pages of disempowering stories that you tell yourself. Now, if you don’t know them, ask a good friend because these are things that you repeat unconsciously on a regular basis. I bet they can point out one, two, maybe 10 or 11 of them. Friends of mine are constantly … I’m asking them like, “What am I saying? What’s the language I’m using?” These are people I’ve chosen to be around because they’re playing at a higher level. Once you’ve written these down, then I want you to go back to them and say, “Hey, what’s the truth? What’s the real reality of this?”
I’ll use the business as an example. “I don’t have enough money to start my own company.” Really? There are tons of books out there to bootstrap your business. You could write down, “I really could start this business by bootstrapping it,” or, “I can really create a good financial business plan and get investors involved.” These are all kinds of opportunities you can create within this lie that you’ve created to flip the script. Now, all of a sudden it’s not something that you can tell yourself because it’s not reality. Or, “I’m not smart enough.” Is that true? If you’re listening to this or watching me right now you’re very smart, because you figured out how to use technology and leverage your time to learn something new and to continue to grow. What’s something else you could do? “Well, I’m not smart enough.” Well, go to the library, you can learn. Get books. Get a mentor.
If you can’t afford to hire the top-quality mentor, find somebody who’s done what you’ve done. Reach out for help. Ask what books they’ve read. Look at YouTube. Go find your resources. “I don’t have time to do X, Y, and Z.” You can get up early. You can go to bed a little earlier and get up early and get that time. Carve it out, or use that time in between things listening to stuff in your car, just like this podcast. Listening to it in your car and multiply your time. Or, “I’m not camera-ready.” Well, I’m not camera-ready and I’m still doing these Daily Growth Hacks. Don’t let these disempowering lies hold you back from your dreams and becoming the author of your own story. I’d love to hear your feedback. Go to the Author of Your Own Story group, please share your experience. It really lights me up to see the experience. Now, I get the emails and I get the messages and I so appreciate those. Thank you. I want you to share in the group, because for every one person that shares, there are at least 20 or 30 people that are watching, reading, and getting inspired by your message. Remember, go out and be the author of your own story.
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